Waiting

I don't know what to write today...

Lord, what will You provide for others?  I will wait.


Yesterday was not the first time that I have sat awaiting the Lord.  There have been days that all I knew was that His presence was real and at rest, but that I was to await His priorities.  It is a still feeling.  A calmness ensues; an eager expectancy that awaits His work.  It is accompanied by another understanding--a deep, disquiet about moving out of the position He has placed me. 

This understanding has come at a great cost.   Far too many times, I have disregarded His direction to my great dismay.  The consequences have been dire.  When I act during the time I should be waiting, it is only because I don't fully trust God to act and that is disaster--just ask Sarah and Abraham. 

The acronym PUSH is so appropriate--Pray Until Something Happens.  My grandmother used to tell us, "Don't move anything you haven't first moved with prayer."  If nothing else, as we try to move the world back to something upright before Him, it is His job to align us in the position that will be the most effective.   A boulder resting at the top of a hill will move with only a small push if it comes from the right position.  Pushing it sideways won't do much and it might be hard to find just the right place on a very large boulder.    Within the process of waiting and praying, I often find that my prayers dramatically change.  What I first asked for would have been wholly inappropriate, but God reordered my prayers during the time I waited. 

Wait upon the Lord...He is worth the wait.

Timing

"But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint."
--Is 40:31

This has become a year of waiting.  I suppose that goes without saying when your word for the year is "dry dock"...  Still, it catches me by surprise sometimes. 

Today I went to the late service to help out with the prayer ministry.  All hands were on deck and it was a great time.  When it was over, I felt driven back to the prayer room.  I sat in the stillness again with no agenda, but without permission to leave.  God's presence was gentle but not overwhelming.  Several people came and left and I enjoyed seeing them, but as they left, I just stayed because the Lord wouldn't let me go.  I had a wonderful time reading and relaxing in the quiet with no idea why I was waiting. 

Eventually one of the other intercessors came in and we had a lovely time talking.  I don't see her often, but she is a true treasure.  She reminded me of things I already knew and told me about how God had rescued her life before she was even born.  I showed her nuances of how God works within her own story that she hadn't considered.  I asked her for prayer and she not only prayed over the work God is doing in my story right now, but also promised to include it in her own journals where she lists the things she regularly brings before the Lord.  I am deeply honored and my strength was renewed. 

Earlier today, the Lord reminded me that He rejoices on the rare occasions that I humbly obey just as much as I rejoice when Katie forms a full sentence on her own.  We are both handicapped.  Katie has speech delays; I am proud and easily morph into a human doing instead of a human being.  We are both learning to get beyond our limitations.  Waiting is a part of the cure for my pride and I'm beginning to really enjoy it. 

My God is good to me.