Last night, I talked about guarding our hearts with a dear friend of mine. She's been terrified of leaving her house since her abusive husband got out of jail. Even though there is a restraining order and seeing her would mean a parole violation that would get him sent back to prison, she's still worried. I can understand, but it's been over 18 months since she last saw him, other than in court and she is such a people person. For the last few months, she's been doing her laundry in her bathtub even though she has terrible back pain.
As we talked about her fears and hesitation, she first pointed out that it's painful to bend down to put her clothes in the washer and dryer. We took that before the ultimate judge, our Heavenly Father, and He confirmed that this is, in fact, the case. However, when we looked a bit closer at the issue, she also recognized that it's even more painful to do her laundry in the bathtub.
Next, she pointed out that she felt ashamed and judged when people saw her hobbling around. So we took that to the Father for judgement as well. The first thing that He brought to her mind was that it shouldn't matter to her what they think. What immediately came to my mind (and took my breath away) was the thought that if she wasn't there they couldn't see her and she couldn't see them. There might be people who needed her.
She remembered then how she would go everywhere on her scooter handing out tracts, witnessing to people, constantly telling them about Jesus. She realized that her fears were probably demonic, encouraged by the enemy to keep her from witnessing as she had before. At this, her entire perspective changed. We even talked about what would happen if she saw her soon to be ex-husband. She has often cried out that she didn't even get to say goodbye. The last time she saw him, he was being carried off by the police for beating her nearly senseless, throwing her in the road in front of an oncoming car, then keeping her in his back seat as the police chased them around town. She admitted that it would be disturbing to see him again, and I agreed. But she also said that she could call 911, and I reminded her that she could say goodbye to him as she called 911.
I left her with the quarters to do her laundry, explaining that she has a boldness to witness that I often wish I had. Investing in her doing her laundry at her complex advances the Kingdom of God and is a good investment, as far as I'm concerned. At that, she got even more excited.
And I'm even more excited than she is to see the fruit of our labors together.